Emotional fortitude through facing reality (Part 2)
Denial is the unwillingness to acknowledge and deal with reality, even some of the best leaders among us can be in denial. Many people look up to successful CEOs from Larry Ellison, Elon Musk to Steve Jobs and have tried to discover their secret sauce of success, but the reality is, we are all unique beings and have different definitions of achievements and successes. Being a “wannabe” or trying to emulate a formula for success, is dangerous and may cause us to live in a delusional reality. This reality is driven by extreme self-assuredness, blinding us to our innermost fears which can stop us from seeing the root of the problem.
In some support groups, the following method has been used to help overcome this feeling of shame that we all harbor, the method is as follows- Share it! Speak it out loud, talk until you no longer feel shameful. Personally, I found this practice very powerful. Being honest with ourselves is of the utmost importance when facing pain as it helps us to identify the root causes of the negative emotions, working through them until they are no longer a focal point in our thought stream.
My mentors have played an important role in my life. I myself seek out trusted advisors and coaches with whom I can share my thoughts and problems. Voicing my thoughts and emotions truthfully, I am met with genuine attention to detail and questions which help myself, and my advisors, clarify my thoughts and feelings. This serves as an effective catalyst to expose any areas of weakness and helps to build emotional fortitude.
Facing reality can bring hope My simple definition of hope is “expect good things to happen”. What drives hope? It is not my wishful thinking “everything will be alright” in reality, life is composed of a series of upheavals and struggles that provide us with lessons.
It is a training ground and we cannot avoid the trials and tribulations that are there to serve our greater good. Facing reality can help us develop resilience and character to withstand these trials.
When we cast our minds back to those moments where we experienced pain or setbacks, we can look back and be thankful. Thankful for those hardships that shaped us into the person we are today. Thankful that we can look back on those moments and realise that, actually, they weren’t as hard as we once thought. Reality creates hope and hope helps us to build an emotional fortitude that can weather any storm because the truth is, we are conquerors.
My crutches are my lifelong reminder that I am not ashamed of my weaknesses, but instead they empower me with the strength and transformative power to face reality. My crutches are no longer my walking aide but an accelerating ski that helps me enjoy the course of life while navigating the uncertainties of reality with joy and excitement.
